If you’ve got OCD, you’ve probably had this thought hit you like a verdict:
“I’m broken.”
And it doesn’t feel like a dramatic statement. It feels… accurate. Because the anxiety is loud, the thoughts are weird, your body reacts like there’s a real danger, and your mind will not let it go.
So you start thinking, Well… normal people don’t experience this. Something must be wrong with me.
But here’s what I want you to hear clearly:
“I’m broken” is one of OCD’s most effective lies.
Not because it’s true — but because of what it makes you do next.
It makes you treat your experience like an emergency that must be solved, fixed, or figured out right now.
And that single shift — turning your inner experience into an emergency — is exactly how OCD keeps the loop alive.
OCD turns uncertainty into a personal diagnosis
OCD takes normal human uncertainty and turns it into a story about your identity.
An intrusive thought shows up.
Your body spikes with fear.
Your brain says: “See? This proves something is wrong with you.”
But it’s backwards.
The spike doesn’t prove danger.
It proves your threat system is misfiring.
That’s what anxiety does. It’s an alarm system. And with OCD, it’s like the alarm is going off when there isn’t actually a fire.
The problem is, when the alarm is loud enough, you start behaving like there must be a fire.
And that’s where the compulsions come in.
The real issue isn’t brokenness — it’s training
This is the part most people miss.
If you’ve been stuck for a while, you stop seeing OCD as something you’re experiencing… and you start seeing it as who you are.
You confuse the symptoms with your identity.
You think:
- “I’m broken.”
- “I’ve ruined my brain.”
- “I’ll never be the same again.”
- “This is just how I am now.”
I used to believe that too.
When I was really struggling, I’d have these horrendous waves of anxiety in my body all day long. It felt like a faulty alarm system — constantly shouting:
Watch out for this.
What if that happens?
Figure it out.
Solve it.
It was absolutely exhausting because I felt like I had to put out the fire all day. I had to get to the bottom of it. I had to think about it. I had to analyse it. I had to finally find the answer that would make me feel safe.
And it went on for years.
So of course I started to believe I was broken.
Neuroplasticity changes the whole story
When I was 18 or 19, there wasn’t as much common knowledge about neuroplasticity. And there was this old-school idea floating around that by the time you’re a young adult, your brain is basically set.
As in… this is you now.
That thought is terrifying when you feel stuck.
But neuroplasticity completely changes the story.
Because it means your brain isn’t static. It evolves. It rewires. It adapts.
And importantly:
Where you place your attention — and what habits you repeat — can strengthen certain pathways.
Which means if OCD has been trained in… it can be trained out.
Not overnight. Not with a magic trick. But through repetition and a new response to discomfort.
How OCD actually gets trained
Here’s the pattern.
You get an intrusive thought (or a sensation, or doubt).
A wave of fear, shame, uncertainty or disgust hits the body.
And then the mind says: “Do something. Fix this. Get certainty.”
So you do a compulsion:
- rumination / analysis
- reassurance-seeking
- checking
- mental reviewing
- googling
- asking people
- scanning your body
- avoiding situations
- testing your feelings
And the compulsion gives you a bit of relief.
Maybe it calms you down for a moment.
Maybe it numbs the anxiety.
Maybe it gives you that tiny “ahhh” feeling.
But the brain learns something very specific:
“That was a threat. And the compulsion saved us.”
So next time, OCD comes back stronger. And faster.
And now it’s not just the original thought you’re dealing with — it’s the habit you’ve built around it.
That’s not brokenness.
That’s learning.
And that’s good news, because learning can change.
The frustrating deal compulsions offer you
Compulsions are basically a deal you make with yourself:
“I just want to feel better right now.”
And they sort of work… in the short term.
But what you’re really doing is pushing the fear into the future.
You’re saying:
I’m not learning to tolerate this now, so I’ll have to deal with it later.
And later it’s usually worse, because the loop has been reinforced again.
The alternative is not “thinking your way out” of OCD. It’s training a new response.
And one of the most powerful ways to start is this:
Delay the compulsion.
Even for 10 minutes. Even for 15.
Because often, in that short window, you start to see something important:
This wasn’t a real emergency.
This was activation.
This was your nervous system shouting.
And you don’t need certainty to survive it.
You don’t need to fix yourself — you need a new relationship with doubt
This is where people get it wrong.
They think recovery means:
- never feeling doubt
- never feeling anxiety
- never having intrusive thoughts
- being confident all the time
No.
Recovery is learning a new relationship with uncertainty… and a new relationship with the urge to fix yourself the moment discomfort shows up.
You learn to tolerate the feeling in your body without rushing to “solve.”
You learn to allow the thought to be there without turning it into a court case.
You learn to refocus on your life, even when your brain is noisy.
And over time, that becomes the new training.
A simple practice for this week
Next time the “I’m broken” thought shows up, try this:
- Label it: “That’s the brokenness story.”
- Name what’s really happening: “My threat system is firing.”
- Delay the compulsion: Give it 10 minutes before you analyse, check, or seek reassurance.
- Refocus: Do something small and real (walk, shower, message a friend, tidy something, start one task).
You’re not trying to feel good.
You’re teaching your brain you can feel discomfort and still move forward.
That’s the work.
Want support with this?
If you’re really relating to this, I do have a 12-week programme that helps you build these skills properly, step-by-step.
It’s based on my own experience with OCD and the work I’ve done with hundreds of people to help them break the cycle.
The programme includes one-to-one coaching, structured videos, a community, and optional weekly group sessions.
If you want to apply, head to robertjamescoaching.com
And remember:
You’re not broken. You’re trained. And you can retrain this.
DISCLAIMER
This article is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are dealing with OCD, anxiety, or any mental health concerns, please consult a licensed mental health professional for support.
